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Did I Cause My Child’s Dyslexia or ADHD? What Nature vs. Nurture Actually Says

Did I cause my child's dyslexia or ADHD? Many parents ask it late at night. Here is what nature vs. nurture actually says, and where to put your energy instead of blame.

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Learning Success infographic titled Nature, Nurture, and Your Child's Path. Understanding the Wiring: a learning difference like dyslexia or ADHD is part of how a child is wired, it is not a reflection of parenting, and it was not your fault. Growth is a Skill: a difference is not a verdict, and reading and attention grow with the right teaching and practice. Shifting the Story: lift the weight of blame and focus your energy on the next skill to build. Steps to take: set down the fault question, say still building instead of broken, give step-by-step instruction, and work with teachers or specialists to choose the first skill.
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Learning Success infographic titled Nature, Nurture, and Your Child's Path. Understanding the Wiring: a learning difference like dyslexia or ADHD is part of how a child is wired, it is not a reflection of parenting, and it was not your fault. Growth is a Skill: a difference is not a verdict, and reading and attention grow with the right teaching and practice. Shifting the Story: lift the weight of blame and focus your energy on the next skill to build. Steps to take: set down the fault question, say still building instead of broken, give step-by-step instruction, and work with teachers or specialists to choose the first skill.

It comes at night, after the homework fight. Did I do this? Was it the screens, the move, or not reading to her enough? Maybe a relative said something at dinner, and it stuck. If you have asked yourself these questions, you are not alone.

Common questions from parents

Is dyslexia caused by bad parenting?
Our position is no. The International Dyslexia Association (IDA) names three kinds of causes. They are genes, the brain and the child’s world, working together. That is not the same as blame. No parent chose any of it. What you do now still matters, because reading has to be taught.
Is ADHD genetic?
Twin studies say it runs strongly in families. One 2025 study looked at more than 19,000 Dutch twins. It found this for ADHD, dyslexia and math difficulty (van Bergen and colleagues). Genes are a big part of the story. They are not the whole story. Focus is a skill that gets stronger with practice.
If it is in the genes, does teaching still help?
Yes. Genes are only part of the picture. For reading, clear teaching of sounds and letters builds the skill, step by step. The IDA names a child’s world as one of the causes. Teaching is part of that world, and it is the part you can shape.
How do I know which skill to work on first?
Start with what you see at home. Talk with your child’s teachers about it. Our free Learning Difficulties Analysis asks about reading, focus and more. It is a starting point, not a diagnosis. Might your child need an IEP or 504 plan? Only a professional evaluation can get those supports. The same goes if you suspect a vision, hearing or medical cause.
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Did you cause your child's dyslexia or ADHD? Our answer is no. Genes, the brain and a child's world all play a part. What you do next still shapes the path.

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What does this infographic say?

The image asks you to put down one heavy question: did I cause this? Here is what each part says, in plain words.

  • The wiring: dyslexia and ADHD are part of how your child is built. It is not a grade on your parenting.
  • Growth is a skill: a struggle is not a final verdict on who your child is. Reading and focus are skills still being built.
  • Shifting the story: we see this in the families we work with. When a parent lets go of blame, the child feels safer asking for help.
  • Steps to take: set down the fault question. Say “still building,” not “broken.” Teach step by step. Choose the first skill with your child’s teachers.

One part of the image needs more detail. It says these differences are rooted in how a child is wired. The full picture includes the world around the child too. The next section explains.

Hunting for someone to blame wears you out. Your child needs that energy for the next step.

Laura Lurns · Learning Success expert

So is it nature or nurture?

It is both, and they work together. In 2025, the International Dyslexia Association (IDA) rewrote its definition of dyslexia. Here is its line about causes:

“The causes of dyslexia are complex and involve combinations of genetic, neurobiological, and environmental influences that interact throughout development.”

In plain words, genes, the brain and a child’s world all play a part. They shape each other as a child grows. No one piece decides the story on its own.

Twin studies point the same way. A 2025 study looked at more than 19,000 Dutch twins (van Bergen and colleagues). It found that dyslexia and ADHD run strongly in families, through genes.

Two old ideas pull parents in opposite ways. One says poor parenting causes these differences. The other says genes decide everything, so nothing you do matters. The IDA definition fits neither one.

Our position is plain: you did not cause your child’s dyslexia or ADHD. And what you do next still matters.

Key takeaways

  1. Both, not either: genes, the brain and a child's world work together as a child grows.
  2. Not your fault: our position is plain; you did not cause your child's dyslexia or ADHD.
  3. Energy on the next skill: pick one skill, teach it step by step, and build from there.

If it is not my fault, what do I control?

You control what happens next. That is where we would put your energy. Genes set part of the starting point. Teaching and practice shape the path from there.

  • Set down the fault question. Hunting for someone to blame wears you out. Your child needs that energy for the steps ahead.
  • Change the words. Say “still building,” not “broken.” Your child hears the difference.
  • Teach it step by step. Reading has to be taught. The National Reading Panel (2000) found step-by-step phonics teaching helps children read.
  • Pick one skill to start. Talk with your child’s teachers about what you see at home. Choose one skill, and build from there.

Read more on what is still yours to build.

“Although identification and targeted instruction are important at any age, language and literacy support before and during the early years of education is particularly effective.”
International Dyslexia Association, 2025

Genes set part of the starting point. Teaching and practice shape the path from there.

Laura Lurns · Learning Success expert

You don’t need a credential to be the most important teacher your child will ever have. You already are one. The old system says wait and see. Waiting has never taught a child to read. Teaching does. Start with our free Learning Difficulties Analysis: questions about what you see at home, in reading, focus and more.

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Your school district must evaluate your child free of charge if you ask in writing, whatever your income and whatever the outcome (US, 34 CFR 300.111 and 300.301(b)). That route takes time and answers a different question than you do. This one starts today, from what you already know.

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A screener is a starting point, not a diagnosis. If your child might need formal accommodations (an IEP or 504 plan), or you suspect a vision, hearing or medical cause, pursue a professional evaluation too. That is the only route to those supports.

References

  • International Dyslexia Association (2025). Definition of Dyslexia. Adopted October 22, 2025. dyslexiaida.org
  • van Bergen, E., de Zeeuw, E. L., Hart, S. A., Boomsma, D. I., de Geus, E. J. C., & Kan, K.-J. (2025). Co-occurrence and causality among ADHD, dyslexia, and dyscalculia. Psychological Science, 36(3), 204-217.
  • National Reading Panel (2000). Report of the National Reading Panel: Teaching Children to Read.
· Learning Success expert Writes about the learning brain for parents who want plain answers. Every article is grounded in current neuroscience and classroom practice.

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