She used to love the bug book and the magnet set. Then one night she pushes her math away and says, “I’m not a math person.” Or she tells you science is more of a boy thing. You did not teach her that, and it stings to hear it. Heard a line like this at your table? You are not alone.
Common questions from parents
Are girls worse at math than boys?
If girls are as able, why do fewer choose STEM?
Is it true only 10% of parents encourage daughters to be engineers?
How can I encourage my daughter’s interest in science at home?
What should I say when she says she is not a math person?
Girls score about the same as boys in math. So why do fewer stay with STEM? Two studies, and three things to try at home.
What does this infographic say about girls in STEM?
STEM means science, technology, engineering and math. The image has three parts. Here is what each one says, in plain words.
- The barrier: stereotypes, not ability, tell girls that STEM is not for them.
- The confidence gap: girls often doubt their skill more than their work shows.
- The reality: girls are as able in STEM subjects as boys.
- Parent support: girls who get steady support are more likely to stay interested.
- The action plan: encourage exploring, give her tools and books, and celebrate her work.
Two parts of the image need a correction. It says only 10% of parents encourage daughters toward engineering. That number comes from a 2008 survey for the American Society for Quality. It was what girls said about their parents, not what parents said. Boys gave a much higher number: 31%. The image also sorts its first two points under “Myths.” They are not myths. They are the image’s own main points.
Nobody is born a math person. You build it, one hard problem at a time.
Laura Lurns · Learning Success expert
Are girls less able in math and science?
No. One large review pulled together 242 studies of math scores (Lindberg et al., 2010). On average, girls and boys did the same. The spread of scores was close to equal, too. So a boys’ “math brain” is not what the scores show.
So where does the gap come from? One small study points at the messages girls pick up. Beilock and her team studied 17 elementary teachers and 117 students (2010). They followed them for one school year. Some girls came to believe math was for boys and reading for girls. By the end of the year, those girls scored lower in math. The study was small, and it shows a pattern, not a cause.
Here is our view, from what we see with families. Many girls do not leave STEM because the work is too hard. They leave because they decide it is not for them. That belief forms quietly, from toys, shows and offhand comments. The good news: a parent gets to talk back to a belief.
Key takeaways
- Equal in math: Across 242 studies, girls and boys scored about the same in math (Lindberg et al., 2010).
- Beliefs shape the gap: In one study, girls who saw math as a boy thing scored lower.
- Parents send a message too: Explore with her, give her tools, and praise the effort she puts in.
What can you do at home this week?
You don’t need a credential to be your child’s first teacher. You already are one. Here are the image’s three steps, made practical.
- Ask her to explore. Wonder out loud with her. Why does ice float? How does a bridge hold a truck? Let her test an idea, even a wrong one.
- Give her the tools. A magnifying glass, a building set, a library book on space. Look for a STEM club or a free museum day near you.
- Celebrate the work, not the brain. Say “You kept trying on that hard problem.” Skip “You’re so smart.”
Why praise the work? In six lab experiments, effort-praised children kept trying longer after a hard problem (Mueller & Dweck, 1998). Children praised for being smart gave up sooner. Those studies were short and run in a lab, not at home. Still, praising effort is what we recommend to every family. And if she says “I’m not a math person,” answer the belief: “Nobody is born a math person. You build it.” You will find more ways to help your daughter see STEM as hers. There is also a look at why there is no “science brain”.
“Taken together, these findings support the view that males and females perform similarly in mathematics.” (Lindberg, Hyde, Petersen & Linn, 2010)
In our experience, girls rarely leave STEM because the work is too hard. They decide it is not for them.
Laura Lurns · Learning Success expert
Nobody will ever advocate for your child as hard as you will. An old message says math and science belong to someone else. It reaches girls before anyone checks what they can do. You get to send a different message every day. Our free Growth Mindset Program shows you how to praise effort, step by step. Get the free Growth Mindset Program.
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References
- Lindberg, S. M., Hyde, J. S., Petersen, J. L., & Linn, M. C. (2010). New trends in gender and mathematics performance: a meta-analysis. Psychological Bulletin, 136(6), 1123-1135.
- Beilock, S. L., Gunderson, E. A., Ramirez, G., & Levine, S. C. (2010). Female teachers' math anxiety affects girls' math achievement. Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, 107(5), 1860-1863.
- Mueller, C. M., & Dweck, C. S. (1998). Praise for intelligence can undermine children's motivation and performance. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 75(1), 33-52.
- American Society for Quality / Harris Interactive (2009). Survey of youth and adults on engineering careers, fielded November-December 2008.
