When counseling adults, they often bring up childhood events that formed their opinions of themselves.  These adults, later in life, realize how negative events shaped their self-esteem, career choices, relationships, and overall well-being.

During counseling sessions, I hear of tales of degrading and unkind words from teachers, bully like behavior from peers, and so on stemming from a learning or physical disability.

How as parents and teachers can we prevent these negative events before they blemish a child’s self-esteem?

Alex was such a child.  Damaged by a childhood event. During his fifth-grade year, he was called upon by his teacher to read out loud for the class. The teacher stops Alex from continuing and commands another student to read instead. If that was not humiliating enough, the teacher sent Alex out of the classroom with an ultimatum. When Alex learned to read then he could return to his class. In spite of Alex’s effort, his reading did not improve.

During his fifth-grade year, he was called upon by his teacher to read out loud for the class. The teacher stop pedAlex from continuing and commanded another student to read instead. If that was not humiliating enough, the teacher sent Alex out of the classroom with an ultimatum. When Alex learned to read then he could return to his class. In spite of Alex’s effort, his reading did not improve.

“WHEN YOU CAN READ YOU CAN COME BACK TO CLASS!!!”

In spite of the threat. And in spite of Alex’s effort, his reading did not improve.

Alex was later diagnosed with dyslexia. No amount of effort trying to read would have helped much. Without addressing the micro-skills causing his dyslexia, no amount of effort or extra practice would help.

The only thing this teacher did was severely damage Alex’s self-esteem.